he asked. And then? I died laughing. I laughed so hard my head exploded off the top of my neck and then rolled around on the floor awhile. While the rest of me kept laughing. And then?
I managed to bring myself back to life and answer the x-ray technician, "No, there is NO way I could be pregnant!"
And then he took x-rays of my broken left foot. Remember when I made that crack about My Left Foot? Well, now I have a CRACK in MY LEFT FOOT. Weird, huh?
And a total pain in the ass.
I wish I could tell you I broke it doing something totally awesome, like running with the Blond Mom Gang who finally let me in to their inner boot camp circle. Or scaling a high fence chasing a prowler out of my neighbor's yard. Or practicing my sweet jump roping skills. But alas, I broke it…walking. Yes, walking.
I was walking in a parking lot that had been blocked off for a flea market, so I was walking and looking and obviously, I am not capable of doing both activities simultaneously, and one second I was just walking and admiring some horrible, awful thing someone cheap ass was trying to unload on another cheap ass and BLAM! Down I went. In front of, oh I don't know, THREE HUNDRED PEOPLE. I just didn't see the speed bump (I mean, who expects to see a speed bump in the middle of a flea market? There are cracked mirrors and moldy quilts to look at for crissakes!) and my foot landed on the very end of it and then WHAM, my foot turned a crazy angle to the left and there you go. Broken foot.
And it's not like I have two crawling babies at home. That like to escape the baby pen/petting zoo we've set and become Free Range Babies and wreak havoc all over the house. And suck on Bosco's chew toys. And lick the bottom of BeBop's flip flops that he leaves around. OH WAIT. I do have two crawling babies at home that like to cause all sorts of mayhem.
But it's not like I have oh, 40 people coming over on Saturday for a Baby Blessing/early birthday party or anything. OH WAIT. I do have 40 people coming over on Saturday for just such an event.
I am super, super screwed.
But what are you going to do, really? My sister is coming to help, and my outlaws are also coming, so I'm hoping that I can just sit on a chair and drink heavily and order people around and honestly, that sounds like a pretty good weekend to me.
We are having this Baby Blessing thing and apparently, people get very freaked out when you do something…slightly different. What is it? What do we wear? What do we do?!? Do we bring gifts?? GOD HELP US WHAT IS THIS EVENT YOU'RE CALLING A BABY BLESSING?!? This is what I've heard from friends and family the last couple of weeks.
I'll post the ceremony next week, but the deal is we wanted to host a gathering of our family and friends (a ritual, if you will) to welcome Jax and Parker into our lives. I stole most of it from the Internet wrote it, and we both have parts to read, as do our parents and both Godparents. I think I'm also reading a letter I wrote to the babies the night before they were born, but we'll see how weepy I am that day. (Perhaps the Vicodan will help.) Then we'll have food and drink and yummy cupcakes to celebrate the babies' birthday, even though it's early.
We did have them baptized in our church the weekend before last, "Just in case" as one of my friends said. But really, because I knew it was important to my parents. We outfitted them in the traditional garb, a long white dress for Parkie, complete with bonnet, and a little white suit for Jackson. They looked adorable, I must say.
And it gave BeBop the perfect opportunity to make all kinds of Godfather references that to be perfectly honest, I didn't really get.
Yikes! I am sorry about the broken foot! At least you have good pain killers.
You make a beautiful family!
fab family foto.
so sorry about the broken foot. But I am with you on the thrill of the flea. Come check out Brimfield if you ever make it to the Bay State–you’d be in heaven.
Sorry to hear about your broken foot. I hope it heals quickly. I think the Baby Blessing sounds great. I know if I get pregnant, I plan to throw a party when I get to 100 days pregnant, which I read about in a book. I’m sure people will think it’s odd, but if I get that far successfully, I think I deserve a party! Love the pics too!
OH MY GOSH they are sooo flipping CUTE! EGADS! And you guys aren’t half bad yourselves! 🙂
I’m sorry about the foot! At least that gets you out of boot camp?? I think it was your secret ploy.
I hope your Baby Blessing party is a success!
By the way, I just found you on Twitter. I am a (secret) Sunset Tan watcher, too. It’s like a train wreck.
love it! i’ve been very torn about whether to baptize and the baby blessing sounds wonderful!!
Ouch. Sorry about the broken foot.
I’m intrigued by the Baby Blessing party, it sounds really cool.
Love the pics!
Sorry about the foot. You gonna sue? JK. (But are you?)Hope the Baby Blessing was everything you hoped it would be.
Your babies = gorgeous.
sorry about the foot!
They do look cute in their baptism outfits!
Ouch! Get better, lady!
I keep thinking that they can’t get any cuter and then THEY DO. My goodness!
HEY, the one of the best times I ever had at a party at our house was when I tore a ligament skiing and could not do ANY hosting duties, and it was really obvious why, so I sat on the couch and people came over to me to visit, and I had a great time since I wasn’t rushing around trying to take care of everyone’s needs like the Hostess with the Mostess which I aspire to be.
I think your party idea/blessing ceremony is a great one! Hope it was lots of fun and that everyone was appropriately overjoyed and overwhelmed!
What a bummer, though, about your foot. You did, however, crack me up with your description of people’s confusion about the event. And my husband also loves to make references to the Godfather movie whenever we talk about the kids’ godparents. What’s up with that?
How long will you need to be off your foot? Can you hire someone to come over and lift the twins when necessary? I hope it heals well and in a reasonable amount of time.